Soft and wet

Ever noticed how old people are weird just because they are old?  They just seem so out of touch with what’s going on. Trends, language use and more of that jazz.

I was on my way to a job interview somewhere in Eindhoven. Quite a good job too.  They had three job openings. Webmaster for a large electronics company, webmaster for one of the biggest information providers, webmaster for a bank. One of the biggest banks too in Holland. Not bad for someone who relies solely on what people call an eidetic memory.  Personally I don’t feel it that way. I have had many people explaining me how it works but it just works the way it does. There is no real explanation.  Get over yourself, already!

On my way over I sat with an old woman in the train. I am not sure what her thing is but she was just trying to make conversation or something. I stared out the window enjoying the green landscapes with cows succeeded by grey tall office buildings. It made me feel dull. It was a long trip and I still had about an hour to go. Oh man, I am never going to survive this.

A few girls got on the train and I got bored. I started to flirt out of habit. A few girls thought I was funny and cute but they had to go off the train pretty soon. I was alone again with that old woman sitting in front of me.

She thought I had a magnetic personality. She referred to my nickname given to me by a few people. I was named “Magneto” by a few people. I actually stole it from my cousin who is a real chick magnet.  I don’t know how he does it. I am not sure I want to know either. He’s just one of those people who know how to do it.

I am not sure what happened but the old woman just kept going and going. She was treating me like a bitch so I started to bitch back at her. She said that I was an asshole. Or that’s what it came down to, for no reason at all.

We started talking some more after I explained her who I was and what I do.

She started talking about dating and sex and whatever else. And somehow , and this really is the weirdest part, we started talking squirting orgasms. What the fuck?

“Oh I never had one of those. I had the normal regular ones but a squirt? No, never had me one of those.”, she said with a serious look on her face.

I didn’t know where to look or hide the amazement on my face. My jaw dropped to the floor. What the hell? Is she telling me, this random 70 something  woman on the train, about her orgasms to a complete stranger? Someone who’s never even seen her before today? What’s the world coming to.

I don’t know why I seem to attract these women and I am sure someone knows why but I just can’t used to these things.